That One Time I got Married to Someone I Barely Knew- Part 1

Remember that one time I got married to somebody I barely knew? Yeah……………

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Here’s the 411 on that…..

My ex-husband walked out of our shared apartment on March 1st, 2015. We were married for a little over a year and I can say outside of things I learned about myself during that time, I was miserable.

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I remember my grandmother and family telling me to wait and me being annoyed with them for not respecting my decision.

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For them not understanding that I was ready to move on to the next stage in my life. I was graduating from college, I was 23, and here was a man who wanted to marry me.

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The day before we got married we got into a big argument our first argument ever actually and I just had this overwhelming feeling that was God telling me that we weren’t ready. That I shouldn’t marry him.

Grandma was like:

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Friends was like:

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My intuition was like: giphy (10)

But my pride couldn’t live with the “I told you so’s”

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and besides I had already had a bachelorette party, everyone had already taken off work I would look crazy if I called it off now!

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I had another opportunity to run away on the day of my wedding when my sorority sister pulled me aside. She asked me was I sure I wanted to do this

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Me: giphy (23).gif

But in the back of mind I was screaming NO! SAVE ME, GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!

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Based on the title of this blog you can tell I went forward with it anyway.

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We got married in front of a few family and friends. I remember looking him right in the eye and he was smiling and crying. He looked so happy like there were no doubts this was what he wanted, I was what he wanted.

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And I was crying on the inside, wanting everyone to stop looking at me.

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Thats all I could think about…. How everyone was staring at us. Thats supposed to be one of the most important days of a womans life and all I could think about was:

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I stumbled through my vows and left the courthouse a married woman.

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The face of someone sooooo happy to be married. Sarcasm

The next couple of months I started to get a taste of the REAL him. The him that was terrible with money and Im a huge saver. The him that would barely defend me when his brother would attack me. The him that never had money for dates but always had money for gambling. The him that kept withdrawing tiny amounts from our savings so I wouldnt notice.

How it started at first:

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How it escalated:

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I started to feel trapped, stuck like I couldnt breathe. He was happy, he had someone to take care of him but no one was taking care of me. Waking up next to him was like waking up to an elephant standing on my chest.

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I would cry and tell him how unhappy I was and he would promise to fix it. But the elephant just got heavier and heavier. I couldn’t stand to look at him, I wouldn’t let him touch me.

Me:

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I just kept thinking what a terrible mistake I had made. The thing that killed me was how happy he was. He was happy and I was miserable and it just didnt make any sense to me.

Him:

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“spend all yall money”

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I didnt want to go against the commitment we made in front of God, and our family and friends, but I couldnt wake up and keep reliving the worst mistake I made ever.

What I thought would happen if I got a divorce, me:

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I cared for him, but I did not love him, and since he had no plans on changing anything (if you think everything is great why would you change?) I knew I had to do what was best for me.

I told him I wanted a divorce.

He told me “for better or for worse“.

I was trapped.

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To be continued… 


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THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 23: Love Lessons as told by Music

Its really crazy how less than two weeks ago I was the man. I had a fiance and a side dude. Now I had nothing, no man, no job, just me in this apartment. I really went from:

 

to on My SWV Vibes with Dre:

& On my Keysha Shit with Dre:

Speaking of James, he wouldnt stop blowing up my phone. He said that we needed to meet. That he had something he needed to get off of his chest. I felt like I owed him that much at least. He asked me to meet him at this local park and I brought my pepper spray along with me in case he decided to slap me again. I was going to beat his ass this time. I saw him sitting on a bench and walked over.

“Hey”, he said standing up greeting me.

“Hi,” I said back.

Before I can even sit down he pulls out this boom box (no lie) and begins to sing Say Something by a Great big World.

Him:

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“Rhea, I will be a better man, please just give us another chance.” he pleaded.

Me:

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Because where the fuck was all this effort BEFORE I started cheating on you? Why do you want to step it up now? It was a little too late, I got really angry and then I  started to cry. I cried for me and for him because I knew I couldn’t ever love him the way that he loved me. Sure, maybe this time would be different but I wasn’t willing to waste another year of my life to see.

At this point, being alone was still the better alternative, with James I was settling, period. I didn’t even think I was settling until I met Dre and so if I want to stay positive I guess I can say that Dre taught me my self-worth. I didn’t know who I was supposed to be with but it wasn’t him. Now that I had a “Dre” James would never be enough. How do you tell somebody that?

For a moment, for a brief moment, I felt bad for him. I felt like I owed it to him to make it work after all he was willing to take me back even after cheating. But then a quote flashed my mind.

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I grabbed the stereo and began to play a song of my own.

 

You ever love someone and had to watch them love someone else?

You ever wanted someone so bad they were all you could think about but you were the furthest thing from their mind?

I stood up.

Him:

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I began to sing ” I cant explain why its him and not you… But at the end of the day baby I just dont want to…..”

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I walked away and I didn’t look back. It hurt me to hurt him but this was for the best. Id rather hurt him temporarily then hurt him for a lifetime  because of “love”

Just because someone loves you doesnt mean you’re meant to be with them. I would rather be lonely for the rest of my life than to wake up next to the wrong person every day.

And here I am alone.

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But then my phone rings and Dre’s number pops up.

Me:

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But I answered like:

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Him:

“I just wanted to apologize for everything I said, things got out of control and we both are adults so we should just squash this. You dont need to quit your job, its not that serious. I love you and I broke up with her because I want to be with you”

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and ride off into the sunset.

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Me:

The reality:

Him: “I just wanted to apologize for everything I said, things got out of control and we both are adults so we should just squash this. You dont need to quit your job, its not that serious.”

Me: “I accept your apology and I want to apologize as well, I knew from the beginning you had a girlfriend and it wasnt right for me to tell her.”

Him: “Thanks for apologizing, I appreciate that……..

I guess if we ever see each other around we can definitely say hi.”

Me:

“Yeah of course…… So I guess this is it?.” I asked rhetorically”

Him: “Yeah I guess so.”

Me: “Goodbye Dre….”

Me:

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But I had too because we had gone from stimulating life changing conversations to “hi”. I had lost not only a lover but a friend.

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This song describes my life perfectly during this time because I read that poem and when I truly had a moment to myself I didnt like the person I had become. A heartbreaking home wrecker, yet it was the freest I had ever felt.

 

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I got an abortion and sat in my apartment alone for two months,  yes, two months, numb.

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Because I couldn’t understand how I could be everything to one person and nothing to the next. Because how it was so easy for him to just toss me to the side?

I would send him the occasional drunk text and he would always respond. But I never saw him again.


The positives: He freed me from the worst decision I ever made. He taught me to be selfish sometimes, and think of me and just me.

The Cons: I cant stop thinking about him… still…

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To Dre: Its been almost two years and Ive been searching for someone that makes me feel the way you do.

To James: Its been almost two years and Ive been searching for someone who can love me unconditionally, flaws and all like you did.

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If you’re reading this…..

Im sorry.

James: For not loving you enough

Dre: For loving you too much.

 

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I ended up alone.

Humbled, and alone.

Moral of the story:

  • Dont be a home wrecker
  • Dont settle for less than what you deserve
  • Dont ruin a good friendship with shit like sex and love.
  • Dont fall in love with someone who loves someone else

The End.


Be on the lookout for the video version of this story! Production begins Summer 17.


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CHERISE

THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 22: Fuck this Shit, All of it.

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Fuck this job.
Fuck James.

Fuck Deandre’s girlfriend.

Fuck Deandre.

Fuck myself, and my bad judgment.

Fuck this Shit, All of it.

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Ke 1Ke 2

In hindsight, this was possibly one of the worst decisions I ever made. I don’t even like drama and yet I just threw myself right in the epicenter of a drama volcano.

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All these feelings all these stupid fucking feelings were to blame. I dont even think I was really in love with him I think that I was in love with the thrill of cheating. Because even though I didnt want James things with me and Dre fell apart shortly after he was no longer in the equation. Dre helped confirm James wasnt the one for me but that didnt mean he was either…

And I only had to destroy everything to come to this revelation so small price to pay right? (Sarcasm). Dre was mad as hell, like flipping out on me mad and I didnt know what to say or do.

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Me:

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Cause damn 6 months, half a year, 182 days, 4380 hours, is a long ass time to be messing with somebody thats “ugly af”. Especially when your girlfriend is so fucking fine right? (she’s not ugly but she aint Beyonce either).

Me:

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He’s like one of those losers who tries to talk shit after they ask for your number and you tell them no.

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Shit, CLEARLY she needs to be minding yours since you out here giving her dick away. :Rolls eyes:

Oh yeah, I quit my job…. I couldn’t walk in there one more day and see his face. No two weeks notice, no phone call, email, I just stopped going.

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I didn’t care how I would pay my bills, make ends meet, I just didn’t want to see him again.


Me: Realizing that Dre’s a grown ass man who cant take responsibility for his actions.

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He was getting on my nerves and now I wasn’t even going to respond anymore.

Me:

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I stopped responding, so he stopped responding and I thought I was free, but then I woke up to even more messages.

Hold on, hold on, hold on……

So I tell you TWICE to “LEAVE ME ALONE” or Ill “TELL YOUR GIRLFRIEND” and you interpreted that as “Let me stay cool with her so she doesnt tell”? “But while Im here we might as well fuck?”

“But shit while Im here let me make sure I come show you a good time for your birthday with your ugly ass?”

“My car got stolen but Imma borrow my moms and make a way to come see your ugly ass?”

“You told me to leave you alone and been ignoring me but Imma walk past your desk a million times and come talk to your cubemates just to be in your space ass?”

 

 

Me:

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Cause something aint adding up…..

You seem to have done the most for this “ugly bitch”.

Did you forget this?

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Because wow, this is the third time I told you to leave me alone! Told you I was done. Told you I wasn’t a hoe or sidechick. Told you if I wanted to start trouble I would…. Did you think I was joking? That this was a game? Did you take this as your opportunity to cut your losses and go back to your “awesome” relationship?

NOPE! Which is why we’re here.

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So you KNEW I was quote on quote “in love with you” or that I had deeper feelings and that wasnt your warning to stay away? To cut ties? Shut it down? Let it go? Get the hell out of dodge?

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Well then BITCH you brought this on yourself!

You should have actually stayed away when I told you!!! You can miss me with that your ugly shit because that didnt stop you from fucking me, didnt stop you from coming over, didnt stop your ass from stalking me at work, didnt make your ass stay away when I said leave me alone. I had to threaten you twice and then actually tell your girlfriend just for you to leave me alone!

Listen! 

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Schools in session cause this is what STAY AWAY or LEAVE ME ALONE means:

 

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To not go near someone…

Avoid.

to STOP……

Because when you REALLY dont want to be around something or somebody you remove yourself.

PERIOD.

Not keep coming around to be “cordial”, aint no cordial bih I said leave me alone!!!!

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Disappear bitch

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Did you forget you told me we wouldn’t stop talking until YOU wanted too? Or did I imagine that?

So cordial? Cordial where? To whom? I dont think telling somebody they cant stop messing with you is cordial. Seems pretty controlling to me.. But you love to be in control, and thats why you’re with her and not me.

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Real Life depiction of Dre and his Gf

Thats why I was so appealing to you because I didnt take your shit, you couldnt control me like you can and do control your girlfriend. But thats also the reason why me and you could never be anything other than a fling. And I didnt realize that until this moment.


I said we should stop talking three times, and all three times YOU wouldn’t let me go.  I said leave me alone because I knew I wouldn’t be able to control my feelings!

Case and point right now.

So if Im a bitch, if im ugly, if Im a monster and you dont like who I am right now…….

 

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To be continued….


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THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 21: Main Vs Sidechick

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You ever do something that goes against your better judgment, and then when it blows up in your face as anticipated you get super pissed off at yourself? That was exactly how I was feeling now.

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Facebook should REALLY invest in a “snatch your DM back button” because I could’ve definitely used it. I dont even know why I did that, this is what happens when emotions get involved. You do dumb shit, like run out on your fiance for somebody with a girlfriend, and then try to get him to dump his girlfriend for you. Because nothing is more romantic than risking it all for someone who obviously a cheater right?

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“Is this a good time to say I told you so?” the angel on my shoulder popped up and asked.

 

“Fuck it, why not, go ahead,” I replied rolling my eyes.

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“Welllllllllllllllllllllllllllll, since Ive only been telling you not to do this since the beginning here we go, bout to drop some bombs on your dumb ass” the angel said

 

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“Okay thats enough, I get your point,” I said to angel.

“Naw one more, one more,” it replied laughing.                                              angel

 

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“Okay Im done,” the angel said laughing before disappearing.                     angel

Me:

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Welp.

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and unfortunately…..

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I was stupid, I was dumb, I was naive. I was hoping she wouldnt respond, that my message would get lost in her message requests or spam. But I wasnt so lucky….

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At first, I thought I’d just ignore her, and hope that she would disappear, but no such luck.

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Yeah, that’s actually exactly what I thought and what I was hoping but of course, I couldn’t admit that to her. I don’t know what type of response I was expecting upon writing her. I dont even know what outcome I was expecting from writing her. But now she was starting to talk a little slick and it was pissing me off.

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Me after I hit send:

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Later that evening I got a text from Dre……

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Me:

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Then another text came in…..

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Life was like:

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Me in that moment:

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and honestly….

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To be continued……. 


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THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 20: Im coming to you as a woman.

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Dre and I recently became friends on social media. He posted a status saying something and I commented on it when I went back to look at the post he deleted it. Im going to assume it’s this baby because everything was annoying me.

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He really had me fucked up. Fuck his status, fuck his girlfriend, and at this point fuck him. I just couldn’t understand his need to do the most for somebody he didn’t even want to be with long term. I was done, I was going to get an abortion, and wipe my hands of this entire situation.

My birthday was two days away and I wanted to be rid of all the drama by then. It was weighing heavy on my heart whether or not I should tell Dre about the baby. In a perfect world, I would tell him about the baby and then he would leave her for me, and we ride off into the sunset being relationship and family goals.

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But the reality was looking more like:

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Tanisha made me go out early to celebrate my birthday and I was glad that I did. I had a ball. It was so needed because the only thing worse than being the main chick in a terrible relationship is being the side chick that develops feelings. The cardinal rule of cheating with someone in a relationship is DONT CATCH FEELINGS.

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It was great when I had someone to come home too but now that James was out of the equation It made me needier for Dre. But no more, I was single and ready to mingle. Tanisha and I were fine so we were in the club taking all kinds of selfies and posting them online.

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Dre had been texting me but I was ignoring him. If he had no intentions on leaving his girlfriend we had nothing else to discuss. We could go back to being co-worker friends and leave it at that.


Dre would not let up, he would text, call, walk past my desk a million times at work. He was willing to do everything but break up with his girlfriend. Even though today was my birthday it was no exception.

“Happy Birthday Rii,” he said coming up to my desk.

“Thanks Dre,” I said dryly trying not to look at him. He was hard to resist and if I wanted to stay strong I needed to stay away from him.

“You hungry? Can I get you anything? Birthday lunch on me,?” he asked.

“No Im good thanks,” I said finally looking up with a fake smile.

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“Any plans tonight for your big day?” he asked not getting the hint I didn’t want to talk.

“Nope, went out with my friends the other night so I am just chilling at home,” I said. I knew what he was hinting towards. An invitation over and as bad as me and my body wanted him, I thought it was best to continue to keep my distance.

“Oh okay cool,” he said finally getting the hint. “I hope you enjoy yourself.”

“Yeah, sure thanks,” I said before I walked away.


Tanisha insisted that I could not be alone on my birthday so she came over with some wine but fell asleep on me. I heard a knock at the door, opened it, and to my surprise, it was Dre standing there with birthday balloons in his hand.

“Whats this?” I asked opening the door.

“I havent liked how things have been between us and I just wanted to make sure you had a good birthday, Im just here strictly as a friend,” he said handing me the bouquet of balloons.

“Great because my other friend is here,” I said pointing to Tanisha. “You can have a seat on the couch,” I said pointing to an open space on the sofa. We both sat down on the couches some space a part.

“You wanna watch a movie or?” I asked him.

“Yeah thats cool,” he said. So I put on a movie.

About ten minutes into the movie he starts play fighting with me.

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“You wanna fight or you just wanted an excuse to touch me?” I asked trying to hold back my smile.

“Come here,” he said.

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“Noooooooooo,” I said playfully

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All of a sudden we went from:

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to:

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to:

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He had me right where he wanted me. He had me right where I wanted to be. Where I wanted to stay, and it was in that moment that I knew I was in love with him. And based on his actions over the past week I knew that he wouldnt let me go. So I was going to force him to choose. It was going to be me or her, he wasnt going to keep both. He wasnt going to make me fall in love with him, run out on my fiance to settle for being his side chick. I always felt like he messed with me because I had what she was missing, and I felt the same way about him. The only difference was I wasnt willing to settle, and I didnt understand why he was. My mind was racing.

I wanted him.

I told him to leave me alone but he kept coming around so that must mean something right?

I want him all to myself by any means necessary.

So understand why I did what I did next.

I logged into facebook, found her page and before I lost my courage:

Kesh

 

To be continued…… 


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THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 19: You Reap What You Sow

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So many of us in life are “fixers” we want to try to fix everything. When things dont go according to plan we accept it as another challenge. Some of us get so focused on fixing we fail to realize that maybe the shit is just broken beyond repair and its time to throw it out and start over.

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My anxiety had me questioning all of my decisions, but one thing I couldn’t deny is that I felt like a new person. Liberated, like the only person or thing that’s been holding me back this entire time was James. It was also an added benefit that I got to spend more time with Dre.

“Damn girl, I cant believe that you actually did that,” Dre said laughing in bed after I told him the story.

“OMG when I say that it was literally like a do or die moment for me. It just came down to did I wanna be labeled a terrible person for following my heart and doing whats best for me or did I wanna feel terrible every day for the rest of my life trying to make something fit that didnt fit,” I said.

“Damn I wouldnt know what to do if my girl did that to me,” he said.

His girl.

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“I forgot about this bitch,” I thought to myself rolling my eyes. In essence that was what I loved about Dre, the fact that when I was with him nothing or nobody else mattered. Not even her. “Can you come over tonight?” I asked putting my clothes back on.

“I cant, date night,” he said kissing me on the cheek. “But I got you tomorrow,”

“Okay sure,” I responded.


The Next Day….

James had been blowing my phone up and it was super annoying. I didnt have anything to say at this point.

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“Did yall see that new hiring class?” Robert asked.

“Naw I haven’t, nobody cares about them,” I responded chuckling.

“Of course they’re all over the member services hunk Dre,” Robert said.

I laughed a little “he has a girlfriend so they can have fun with that,” I responded trying not to show my jealousy.

“We’re still on for dinner after work right? Cause you have to catch me up with yo ole runaway bride ass,” Robert said laughing.

“Of course, James will not stop blowing my phone up like OMG,” I said.

“You must have that good good, cause somebody run off on the day of my wedding, and I cant get my money back, Im sending every female relative to your crib,” he said laughing.

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“Shut up,” I said tapping him playfully getting up. “Im about to take my lunch.”

I usually ate my lunch with Dre, so I walked over to his desk. One of the new hires was there with him laughing it up.

So I popped up and interrupted like:

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“Heyyyyyyy,” I said with a sly smile. “You ready for lunch Dre?” I asked.

“Yeah let me grab my stuff,” he said to me. “Ill check you later,” he said to her.

Seeing him interact with her really annoyed me. Everything was annoying me today. “Who was that?” I asked once we got outside the building.

“Oh shes just a new hire,” he said.

“Are you her trainer?” I asked him

“Naw, Im not.” he replied.

“Ohhhh okay she was being extra friendly at your desk then,” I said.

“Yeah I guess so,” he responded chuckling. “So are a lot of women at this job, if you haven’t noticed Im kind’ve that nigga in this department,” he said confidently.

“Yeah, yeah,” I said laughing, trying not to show I was a little jealous. “We see what you trained me right into.”

“You ever think about kids?” I blurted out changing the subject.

“Yeah sure, I want kids, one day, when Im married,” he said.

“Are you going to marry your girlfriend?” I asked.

“Probably not,” he responded grabbing our food. We sat down on a park bench outside.

“I dont get why you’re with someone you dont see yourself with long term, doesn’t make any sense,” I said eating some of my food.

“I mean for where I am in my life right now, she works, we work,” he said.

My heart dropped. I didnt understand why he insisted on being with someone he didnt want to build with. It was like I dropped my dead weight (James) and subconsciously now I was expecting him to do the same with her. My feelings were all over the place, I was all over the place. I just ran out of my wedding a couple of days ago and now here I am pregnant, getting my phone blew up by somebody who wants me but I dont want. While Im out here looking like a fool because I fell for someone with a girlfriend. It really made me question if I ran out of that church for me, or for him…..

“I think that Im developing feelings for you,” I blurted out before I had a chance to think. “It would probably be best that we just stop whatever this is,” I said to him.

“Rhea, you always do this. I dont understand why you want to mess up something that isnt broken. What we have right now is perfect, and like I told you, we’ll stop messing with each other when I say so,” he said seriously. “Come on, lunch is over,” he said leading me back into the building.

This was the second time he said that to me. Something about that statement made me feel good, desired, wanted. But in reality, I had just jumped out of the pan and into the fire.

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“You ready to go?”Robert asked me as we were packing up.

“Yes sir I am packed and ready,” I said following him out into the elevator. We started to walked outside.

“Giiiiirl I need a drink, and.” before Robert could finish his statement James ran up on us.

“Rhea! I been calling you all damn day!” he yelled at me.

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“You are not going to shut me out my child’s life!” he yelled putting the pregnancy test I threw in the trash in my face.

I was shocked, it was just my luck. “You need to calm down and go home before you embarrass yourself,” I said to him.

He grabbed my arm “no you need to listen to me,”

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“Aye bro let her go,” Robert said pushing him off me.

“This the nigga you been cheating on me with?” James asked walking up on us trying to swing on Robert.

“Stop!” I yelled out as he was charging.

“No this is not who Ive been cheating on you with and its not even your fucking baby!” I screamed out of frustration. “I havent even let you touch me in the past month or so why the fuck would you think this was yours?”

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Before I knew it James reached back and slapped me. I mean slapped the dog shit out of me downtown, in the middle of the street, no fucks given.

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“You stupid bitch! Out here fucking that nigga raw. You’re such a hoe, fuck you and that baby ” he yelled as he stormed away.

I stood there shocked.

My whole life was falling apart around me. I left my main for my side dude but my side dude has no intentions on leaving his main but does not want to let me go as his side chick.

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Now, surprise! Im pregnant, and as a bonus, you can add getting the shit slapped out of me and all my dirty laundry aired in front of my coworker to the list of things I couldnt even be mad about because I brought on myself.

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“Omg what the fuck just happened?” Robert asked pulling me out of my trance. All I could respond was:

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To be continued….. 


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THE QUESTIONABLE LIFE AND TIMES OF RII PART 18: James

 


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I stood at the altar pouring my heart and eyes out to the woman I love. And this bitch turned around and ran away.

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I stood there for a minute like:

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Cause no way she just did this.

My mom:

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My dad:

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My Brother:

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I asked my parents to thank everybody for coming and went to try to find Rhea. I was blowing up her phone with calls and texts but she didn’t answer. I didnt know what I did wrong. I know I fucked up money and sometimes she said she wasnt happy but I thought I made up for it with this wedding.

Everything else, I just needed more time. Damn. I let her get a couple of days to clear her head. I needed to clear mine as well but I knew I wasn’t ready to let this go. I would be whatever type of man she needed me to be. Even one who would let his wife step out and do her on thing from time to time. It low key fucked me up that she was out here fucking another nigga but I was willing to look past that for her.

I was tired of her ignoring my calls and texts so I decided to drop by the house.

“Rhea!” I yelled coming in the house. She was in the bedroom.

“What the fuck?” I yelled. “Whats up why did you just leave like that?” I asked her.

“James that wasnt what I wanted. I think that we rushed things, that we moved way too fast.” she responded.

“So why didn’t you just say that? Why would you have my whole family come out both of our families come out and embarrass me like that?” I asked.

“I didnt bring anyone out! Everything has been you! From wanting to get married to setting the date, making me pick out a dress, the bachelorette party, the church, all YOU! Not me. We could barely pay bills and you wouldnt even take me out but you want to get married? Do you even know what being married would mean? You would actually have to be a MAN, be at the head of the household. Make good decisions! Not ones that put us at risk for being homeless. I want a partner! someone who I can make decisions with, not who makes them for us and calls me to pick up the pieces when you fuck shit up! I need to trust that if I cant get something done you will, and I dont,” she screamed.

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I could tell she had been holding that in for a while. I knew at times I disappointed her but I didnt know it was this bad. “Is this why you cheated on me?” I asked.

“Yes.” she responded.

“So why did you agree to marry me?” I asked her.

“Because you asked, and I didnt want to hurt you. But when I realized that you didnt care about my feelings, when  I walked down the aisle to the church I didnt want to be in, surrounded by people I never invited, and seen you waiting for me at the end of the aisle, I knew I couldnt do it. You could arrange what I didnt want but not once have you done what I actually asked you to do which was STOP GAMBLING and to step it up in the romance department. Neither of which happened. So why would I marry you?” she responded.

“So how can we fix this?” I asked slightly confused.

“To be honest Jay, Im not sure if I want too,” she said. “Be a man, not only have I been fucking somebody behind your back I just left you at the altar and here you are begging to be with me, its not attractive at all,” she said nastily.

“Is this because of that nigga you been fucking? You wanna leave me for him?” I asked getting angry.

“No it has nothing to do with him but everything to do with you. I want to marry a man, a real man, who I can depend on, who has drive and ambition, someone who makes me not want to go fuck another man, someone who makes good financial decisions. Someone I can actually respect, and Im sorry it took me until our wedding day to figure out that you aren’t the person for me, but that just how the chips fell. I made adjustments for you but you never made any for me. I TRIED to become the wife you wanted me to be but at what cost? My sanity? My stability? You think I haven’t noticed you’re STILL gambling? We’re tight on money and you wanna pop up with surprise wedding shit. You have money to do everything else but take care of your responsibilities. Im just done James, Im done. If I married you, you would be upgrading to an iPhone 7 plus and Id be getting a Nokia 3310. And frankly, Im tired of talking about this” she said putting on her workout clothes.

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Did she really just compare a nigga to a Nokia though?

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“Look, I think that this was a lot and we shouldn’t make a decision so hasty, I just can’t accept the fact that two days ago I was supposed to marry you and now you don’t even want to look at me!” I said. “I’ll get my stuff and go stay with my friend until we figure this out.”

“Do whatever you want to do James, I’m going for a run. Lock the door behind you and leave the key please,” she said putting her headphones in and leaving out the door.

I started grabbing some of my clothes. I really couldn’t believe things had got this bad. I know she was holding shit down when I wasn’t working and I maybe overdid it with the spending a few times but damn.

“James?” Rhea called as she walked back in the house. My heart started beating out of my chest I was hoping she was coming back to apologize and to work on fixing this like usual but instead she just asked.

“Hey can you take out the trash when you leave?”

“Sure, no problem,” I responded putting my clothes in a duffle bag. I put my clothes in the car and came back to grab the trash. Locked the door, and left my key under the mat, hopefully, I would get it back soon.

While I was walking to the dumpster the bag broke and all the trash spilled out along with a  pregnancy test.

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It was positive.

To be continued….. 


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Facebook: Cherise Floyd

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THANKS FOR STOPPING BY!
WITH LOVE,
CHERISE